Doomscrolling on Insta has become a part and parcel of my life. I spend the larger part of my day telling patients to reduce their screen times, and then scroll a good 1 GB of insta after dinner and before bed. Before you jump to any conclusions, let me declare unequivocally that I am anything but a hypocrite. In my defence, my consumption of insta content is part of my “research” to help me keep up with the latest social media trends. As I happen to interact with a lot of GenZ and millenials and I need to make a connection with them, ensure our “vibes” match, I have to keep abreast socially as well. That is why I doomscroll insta. Thus, you see, it isn’t what it looks like, and I am a not duplicitous person.
One particular reel that caught my attention was cartoons dancing to a Bhojpuri song called “chai piyenge, hum to chai piyenge”. Now, that is an emotion I strongly feel and relate to as well. I may come back from death if someone offers me a cup of chai. Secondly, I have always been called a cartoon, my mother used to do it when I was in school (and still does), Sakina and Seema and Dhanashree did it when I was in college(and still do), Savni and Komal did it when I was in KEM (and still do), Krishna did it when I was in Delhi doing my postgraduation(obvio.....duh!), and many more continue to do it in hushed tones.
Jab tak Suraj
Chaand rahega,
Cartoon mera
dusara naam rahega!
Till date, I haven’t yet posted a reel on insta which shows me celebrating how vibrating and reverberating my belly fat is. So this song was the ideal candidate for me to make a reel debut and try to see if I can make it to BigBoss next season. Saying so, I started brewing myself a cup of “Poore India me World Famous Jayesh ki Chai adrakh maarke, paani kam doodh jyaada”. The thought that I could write a blog on chai also took roots.
Let me introduce you to Sakina, Seema and Dhanashree. We met in the year 2006 in Ruia, 11 standard, C division, science stream. In junior college at Ruia, the divisions were made based on what we had opted for as our second language. So, people who opted for Hindi as their second language were in “C and D” divisions. Our small group of friends solidified courtesy this stratification system. And, with Hindi as a second language, came our Hindi teacher as well.
Our Hindi teacher, a pentagenerian on the verge of retirement. An old schooler who wore a neat safari, spoke in chaste North Indian Hindi, was as passionate about teaching his subject as was strict and nontolerant about indiscipline in his class. Very difficult for teenagers who’d broken out from school and entered college and wanted to do masti. (In Mumbai, school ended at 10th and 11TH & 12th were pursued in designated Junior Colleges.) Attendance was not free. He would mark you absent if you didn’t answer the roll call in the first go. Mentally absent, physically present was also marked absent. Luckily, Ruia had a strong Mumbai middle class culture and bright students converged there with a common goal to move ahead in life. More substance, less style.
He had a rule, that you had to carry your textbook to class. Anyone without a text book would be shown the way out. “Aap canteen jaao, aur chai peyo.”
And then would start a volley of “But Sir..... Sorry Sir.... I forgot......”
He wouldn’t have any of it. “Aap bhule nahi ho, aap laaye nahi ho, kyunki aap lana nahi chahte the!” he would say (not verbatim)
“Aap canteen jaiye. Unko bolna maine bheja hai. Mere naam ki chai pee lijiye.”
And, with this rule he was impartial, even the most favourite of his students were ceremoniously sent to canteen to sip on “Mere naam ki chai.”
The onus of responsibility lies on you. In many interactions that I’ve had with many non-genuine people over the years, this analogy has come to mind. “O! I forgot” ..... can be anything...... a shared task in a team situation where you’ve done your bit, and the other person hasn’t.......an unexplained delay in completing paper works......... forwarding files........ a phone call you’ve been waiting for....... or in any other format. “Aap bhule nahi ho, aap laaye nahi ho, kyunki aap lana nahi chahte the!” helps save you from investing a lot of your time and energy in the wrong places.
It has been more than 15 years since. As one moved in life, one found oneself having forgotten (unintentionally) to carry that hindi textbook to that hindi classroom (metaphorically speaking). And the masterji in this classroom is even more ruthless in sending you to the canteen. You’d often want to say, “But Sir...... Sorry Sir....... I forgot.......”, masterji aint givvin ya no second chances!!!
So, when someone tells me “Mere naam ki Chai peelo”, I do it and carry my Hindi textbook religiously to the classroom for the next class.
But it is also in this canteen when sipping kisi aur k naam ki chai, that I have met people to whom I can say, "Hello friends, Mai chai pee raha hu. Pappe kha lo".
