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Sunday, May 15, 2011

SHRAVAN KI COUNTRY

One of the best things about medicine as a profession, other than the nobility, money, respect and allied, is that you get to meet a lot of intersting people. And that is what makes life a little easy in the oterwise stressful environs of sickness, death and some 'sick' people.
“Patients are our teachers” is the dictim of medicine and as William Osborne has famously quoted “ To study medicine without textbooks is like charting an unknown sea, but, to study medicine without patients is like not going to the sea at all.” Indeed, patients teach us a lot about life or rather give us a lot of varied perceptions of life.
One thing that I realized after entering medicine, is that India, is a country of drunkards. There are drunkards every where, in every walk of life and every strata of society. Some drink, because they are happy. Some drink because they are sad. Some more drink, because everyone else is drinking. Some others only drink, because they are benevolent. They want to save the food and water for others, and hence decide to keep themselves on alcohol only peparations.
There was this particular Mr. Rada O. G. who was admitted with gastritis. I asked him,

apne peena kab se shuru kiya?”
Array dactar saab, you no English”

I know English”
Fir, ask in Angreji”

Why did you start drinking?”
My pitaji go to swargwas.”

Accha, to aapko sadma laga tha.”
No.NO. No sadma.”

To fir, aapne kyon peena shuru kiya?”
Array Dactar Saab, aapko nahi pata?” Obviously not, or why would I have asked you? But, I didn't tell him this and let him continue. “Streptococcal throat infection kaajeej rheumatic arthritis. Hamre peeeta-jee ko hua tha. Very bad condition. Very painful condition. You know. Every joint akad jaata hai. Thandi me very bad. Hum dekha hu ye sab. ”

To, uska peene se kya sanbandh?”
Array, you people donot know the importace of sanitisation and are kaazing microbial resistance”
To, uska peene se kya sanbandh?”
Array, kaise dactar ho aap, huh. Aap jaise log dacter ban nenge to is desh ka kya hoga. That is why I have to take care of this COUNTRY”

To, uska peene se kya sambandh?”
Thik hai, to listen and remember. Alcohol is the best sanitizer.”

Ye muzhe bhi pata hai. Par, uska peene se kya sambandh?”
What is your medicine. Kitna mehanga!!! God ,God. India is country of poor. I am poor, Aapko sasta dawai dena chahiye!”

To, uska peene se kya sambandh?”
Array baba. I drink alcohol. It kill all the sreptococcus in the throat. I not get arthritis. Understand. Ghar me saat -saat chota baccha hai hamar. Unka future ke baare me bhi to sochna padta hai!”

To appke hisab se muh se bas marna accha hai”
Haan bhaiya. See, alcohol before 18 years crime. OK. I talk to Aplu, Chaplu, Pappu, Gotya, Bablu, Chottu and Rani. They take alcohol from my breath to their breath. They protected”

Accha, aur 18 saal ke baad , toh they only buy their own baatli”
Abhi jaake ki aapne samajdari wali baat!”

Array chacha, aap ko samaj nahi aata ki jitna paisa aap sharab me gava rahe hai, utne me aapke bachhon ki padhai ho jaaye gi. Unka bhala hoga”
Array, this also I do for their bhala only. Today, they not get infection, tomorrow they are healthy. Tell me, health is wealth. To fir I make them wealthy,naa”

That was it coudn't take any more of this, lest he wiuld make me start drinking. I figured he was not in his senses. So I looked around to see if there was any relative whom I could ask some details. I saw a young boy of about 12, standing at the corner foot end of the bed. Poor fellow, looked so weak and fragile. All that his body had was bones and a layer of skin. From the way he was looking at us conversing, it figured out he should be one of the above mentioned. So I moved to ask him.

Ye tere kaun lagte hai?”
He is my father”

Ok. I'll ask you some questions, answer them properly.”
Ok”

Why did you have to bring your father here?”
That day he came home and his stomach was paining. Neighbour uncle said take him to KEM, so we brought him here.”

Hasn't anyone come to relieve you?”
No, I just came from home.”

Then do you not have enough money to wash your clothes?” I asked with serious concern, looking at the state of his clothing.
Why, these clothes are clean only. Baapu says, alcohol is the best cleaner. Baapu sprays alcohol in the house. It keeps the house germ-free. We donot have enough money to buy costly floor cleaners, so baapu uses the same for everything. I go to work at a shop i the evening. Then I study in the night. In the morning, I go to school. Sometimes, I donot get time to take a bath, but one should not be late to school. So, I do not change my school uniform. This is my school uniform. Baapu says it is clean.”

On the head end the BAAPU was over-hearing this conversation and smiling with pride for his off-spring. If only everyone's offsprings could be so obedient.

Accha, tell me has your Baapu ever fallen on the
road in a drunk state?” I tried to make the conversation a bit more meaningful.
No”.

'Thank God!' I thought.
The shop from which Baapu buys his drinks is just behind the bus-stop. They all know him nicely. They sit him in the bus. The bus stops outside our house. So, Baapu comes directly to the house. He has never fallen on the road.” He asserted.

SHARAVAN KI COUNTRY,” I thought aloud.

Array baapu, dactar saab ko bhi Shravan ki dukaan maalum hai”, went a loud message from the foot end to the head end.

Wah! Dactar saab. Apna number dijiye. Kabhi saath me baithenge. Garib ko bhi ek mauka deejiye. Aap bhi kya yaad karenge!”